positive thinking and mister optimist

I once talked about how I have fairly well-meaning friends. They try to be optimistic and happy and they worry about me, to the point where they sometimes harass my closer friends to figure out if I’m okay.

Appreciating these friends is a bittersweet moment for me. On one hand, I love that they care and it causes little residuals of warm-fuzzies that I usually have a difficult time feeling.

On the other hand, it’s exhausting because I have to put up a front that what they said actually made me feel better.

 

But the truth of the matter is, no, it did not make me feel better. Positive thoughts and words don’t work the same for depressed people.

It’s… highly unfortunate. But here are some examples:

Ex 1: “Think about all the people that care for you!”

Normal: Aww, that’s true! I feel so incredibly loved and happy.

Me: That’s true… I’m such a shitty person for inadvertently hurting those people…

 

Ex 2: “There are so many other people out there that are in worse situations than you are.”

Normal: You’re right. I shouldn’t let something like this get me down.

Me: You’re right. God, I’m a failure as a person. I can’t even beat this thought.

 

Ex 3: Snap out of it!

Normal: Okay, okay I know I shouldn’t let it bother me.

Me: Snap out of… what? Isn’t this normal?

 

Ex 4: “You can’t die! Do you know how that would make me feel!?”

Normal: (normal people would not even say they want to die)

Me: I can’t hurt the people that love me… So I’ll keep on living, even though it’s incredibly painful.

 

Ex. 5: “Think happy thoughts!”

Normal: FUZZY PUPPIES!

Me: What… are happy thoughts?

 

Okay that last one is less serious, but the point is… it’s not the same. The same words have devastatingly different effects.

It’s such an annoying dilemma at times…

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