the D card

Today was the day. It finally happened. I finally pulled the D card. You know. The D card. No, no, not that D card. Ew, gutter brain. The doctor card. Even though I graduated this past May with my FNP degree and started into my DNP program in August, I chose to continue working as […]

Coming out

Major depression ruins everything. Whoever first thought that MDD was the perfect way to get attention clearly did not understand the implications of such a disease. Yes. A disease. Just like having diabetes or cancer or even a broken leg, MDD is a disease. Unfortunately, the lack of immediate tangible evidence makes it difficult for […]

ugh, insomnia

In an effort to get my sleeping pattern back on track, I’ve been taking a sleeping pill almost every night before I have to wake up early – early being sometime before 9AM. This translates to taking something 5 or 6 times a week – 3 times for 3 work days, and 2 times for […]


When you see an introverted person, you might see someone who is aloof, quiet, reserved, awkward, unresponsive – not such good stuff. I am an undeniable introvert. Unfortunately, people often mistake that for being shy, because the official definition of an introvert includes being shy. But that’s not necessarily true. You don’t have to be […]

Today is one of those days. I woke up in a sort of haze this morning. It was still fairly dark and kind of foggy outside. I have not had to get up this early in 4 days because I didn’t have work, so going from sleeping at 5am to waking up at 5am was […]

Grummy, Parp, Whimble

Let me tell you a story about Grummy, Parp, and Whimble. When an episode begins, my mind usually splits into three entities: Grummy, Parp, and Whimble. Without fail, these three characters form very distinct personas of each aspect of my depression. Parp is the child you might see in the foster care system – beaten […]

there are no words

When I’m not feeling well, my symptoms usually manifest in one of two ways – my stomach and my heart. My heart usually begins to overwork, as though it needs to pump harder to get blood to the rest of my body. In fact, it pumps so hard, I can feel my entire body pulsating […]